•September 7, 2008 • 1 Comment

im closing this blog.

i don’t like it at all.

i have started again.

its more me there.


there are no coincidences

•September 3, 2008 • Leave a Comment

there really isn’t. i believe things happen for a reason and when they happen there is a message in them.

i signed up on facebook today. i was fighting it because its just one more account to log into and frankly i don’t have the time. but i did it.

and i found a friend from over 10 years ago.

that’s cool, you say.

the thing is i have been wrestling about GOD. it doesn’ t feel like HE likes me. i don’t get moved in church. the songs i hear spark nothing in me whatsoever. sometimes it feels like HE just left without any explanation.

and then i find my friend.

and my friend and i have been through things since we saw each other last.

i feel like there are stories to tell and things to learn that may have been what i have been stuck on all of this time.

i don’t think it was random that all of this happened today. i think maybe GOD saw me in need and made this happen.

at least i hope so.

more to come.

come find me on facebook here.

do things like this happen where you are?

i have 5 pounds of sugar and only a 2 pound sack.

•August 29, 2008 • Leave a Comment

ever felt like that?

kind of like walking into a museum and not knowing what to see first.

or having a ton to say but not knowing how to start.

kind of like that.

ill start with something easy.

this morning during the commute to work, traffic went from 70mph to zero in a matter of seconds.

its always like this but that’s not the point.

as i stomped on the brake and caught my breath, that sense of dread you get sometimes just washed over me.

i looked in my rearview mirror and watched the headlights behind me get closer and closer until they disappeared out of sight.

i gripped my steering wheel, gritted my teeth with all of my might, and braced for the bump.

but no bump happened.

the car stopped. although it seemed like it was close enough for the driver to reach in my car and turn the radio station.

how much of life is like that?

you’re sailing along, able to avoid some danger on one hand and then find yourself bracing for something else.

and at the end all you have is you holding on for dear life and with a funny face?

where are your posts?

•August 24, 2008 • 1 Comment


we haven’t talked in a good while. i know. its just like me to just drop out and to come around again.

but i think we’re friends. and real friends accept one another as they are right? isn’t that how its supposed to go?

it’s hard here in my world right now.

i feel a little helpless because there are things happening.

i can’t go into it. some things are private. we’re all going to be there one day. i hope its easier for you.

its hard to know that God loves you when things like this are going on. its harder when your arms and words can’t take pain away completely.

but there has been sunshine. you know that must mean a concert.

starlite and I got to see tristan prettyman in a very small intimate setting, a yoga studio. it was a radio station invite/contest thing and i missed the contest.  long story short tristan prettyman put us on the list herself. how super cool is that?

her set was brief but perfect. and it was the twin’s first concert. afterwards she came right over and introduced herself. and she loves kids. and my kids love her. they dance to her cd now. she signed autographs and posed for pictures in the heat. she’s on tour right now, and i know she’s road weary, being a traveler myself but you would have never known. she has grace, real natural grace. that’s awfully rare i think.

that was definetely a highlight of the last two weeks. one im grateful for.

so go here or here. find out about tristan. you’ll be glad you did.

and any prayers you want to throw up to the big guy would be cool too.

i want to punch Jesus in the nose…

•August 12, 2008 • 4 Comments


i just wrote that.

you gasped when you read it.

i heard you.


today there is a case of a toddler who was starved to death because he refused to say “amen”.

his mother was in a cult.

have you ever seen someone starving to death?

to make it worse his mother stuffed his little tiny body into a suitcase, and would spray disinfectant every so often because she believed God would resurrect him.

some of us aren’t shocked.

these kill me everytime.

i cried on my couch one night after hearing about the father that threw all four of his young children off a bridge in alabama to get back at his wife over some argument.

i shouldn’t be surprised. we hear about how broken the world is every sunday. and we all shake our heads in agreement and then move onto our “personal” relationship with God and how following Him will make our lives full and complete.

i know this isn’t the most fun post you’ve ever read.

there is a list of questions i struggle with trying to follow Jesus.

this is a big one. Why does God let bad things happen?

My pastor likes to quote that verse in romans “All things work together for the glory of God…” or something like that.

part of me thinks…”Dude, how does this little boy being starved to death work for glory?”

so yeah, sometimes, i do want to punch Jesus in the nose. only because i want answers.

how do you deal with this stuff?

im positive its tuesday…so its positive post tuesday

•August 12, 2008 • 2 Comments

i am a blog fanboy. i know. i accept it. i live with it.

my rollcall isn’t nearly as big as the list of blogs i read. it should be. you’re right. ill work on that.

this lovely tuesday i want to talk about some people that inspired or affected me and my world this week.

ive never met anyone who writes the blogs i read.

i hope to. i probably will. i think you should probably try to meet the people you’ve been reading for a while. you know they’re real people by what they write but i think that if you only read these people and not meet them then they are more an idea.

make sense?

tam has been shaking the world up this week with her posts. authenticity has been escaping her head and hands in spades so go read about it. its good to see people being so honest about life. there’s strength in being open and tam is a powerlifter, only not with the gut and the sweatiness.

john edwards made the news this week. joshua said everything there is to say about it.

alot of times when we go to church, all we hear is the sugar coated goodness about life in Christ and there are never any problems and everything is okay, like you’re trapped in the Truman Show or something. however, this is real, the other side of it.

amos, tyler, and all of the west coast bloggers are making me seriously consider moving to the west coast.

say it slow – california – sounds romantic and mysterious huh?

i only forward you these links because its what challenged me this week. ive said before how much i love you guys. what makes me smile is just how many real conversations are taking place in blogdom and not just celebrity gossip or people giving play by play to their lives.

so thank you guys.

and for those of you who may want to meet the culprit behind this rambling nonsense of a blog, email me, and we’ll set something up.


•August 9, 2008 • 1 Comment

john edwards admits to an affair he previously lied about.

russia invades georgia with planes and tanks.

caylee anthony is still missing and everyone thinks her mom knows something and is not telling.

i could give line after line of nothing but the worst of the world but i wont.

im sitting here wondering just how bad it will all be before it ever gets better.

sometimes it seems that the prayers of the broken and the hopeful are lost before they can reach the heavens.

im just tired. sorry for grumbling.